Ice and Fire

Ice and Fire


Sometimes I turn away from my sexuality.

Being told that I've overwhelmed them can make me step back, scared of myself.

I get worried that all I am is a walking hormone.

Then have a friend call me by that same phrase (even with a joking laugh) just helps to reinforce the fear.

Sex is good. I know that.

Sex is healthy. I know that as well.

But too much of a good thing can be bad, so I get worried that this fever and want in my blood is too much.

And I lock up.

I cool my heated blood out of sheer reaction and end up encased by ice.

I get to the point where things that I know feel good have no effect whatsoever.

Thank the gods for other friends and lovers.

Gently kissing away the fears, challenging it.

Challenging me and asking what I want.

"Make me burn and melt the ice away."

And now I'm standing in a puddle, metaphorically, shaking off the last of the chill.

Oceans of Orgasm

Last week, I needed escape. There's bad things happening on the family medical front.

I had been to a "Girl's Night Out" type of event, and it was near my lover Elf's house. The weather turned into an awful mess, and between the rain and leaves on the road it made driving interesting. So to only be driving for 15-20 minutes instead of closer to an hour, I made a phone call and ended up at Elf's house.

After hanging out for a while, and a much needed White Russian and some comfort food, I settled into sleep.

Elf's married and with small child. They are a poly couple, and live in a large house with another poly couple that they have relationships with. He went up with his wife and child to settle them into bed and came down to visit with me and offered me "quality time" if I was interested, considering the family issues I was dealing with. And, I don't tend to turn down a chance at getting him alone and naked because with him... it's not something we can share all that often.

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There was an amusing moment when Elf was upstairs and the husband of the other couple was going to another room to work (he usually works 3rd shift, so his schedule even on his off nights is a bit night-owlish). He warned me that he'd be coming through the family room (which is where I was going to be sleeping) to get to the stairs and his bedroom. His wife told him, "No, you should go outside and around the front." Because she, the wise woman, knew out that Elf would come down and visit and figured that her husband walking in on things would not be a good thing.

I think she clued him in later on.

So... there I was getting a bit of quality time in with Elf. I was laying on my back and he was finger fucking me. He whispered to me to relax, and I did. Then suddenly something happens that I've only heard about happening to other people.

I felt a wave, from the inside, and then a liquid warmth flowed out of me. The only thing I can think of is that I ejaculated... which is something that Elf and I have tried for before with no success. A couple of more thrusts with his fingers and it happens again.

The orgasm was much different than usual. My orgasms tend to be trembling affairs of trusting and clenching, with harsh breathing and breathless cries. This was more like... unraveling.

Well, the whole thing turned him on so much that he grabbed a condom and proceeded to fuck me for all he was worth. Which I didn't object to in the slightest.

Well... next time, we're keeping a towel on hand if time permits this slow buildup and crash into this sort of orgasm.

Early Halloween Half Nekkid Thursday

Here I am, "chained" to a table, tortured and dying.

Keeping those loose chains on was a bitch. I wrapped them around my wrists to make it look like I was chained to this table, and they kept sliding off when I had to thrash around in "pain".

My hips were at a wierd angle because my legs were numb from dangling them down the table legs and I had to tuck one up under the other to keep my back and legs semi-happy.

Half Nekkid Thursday- Marks of Pleasure

I like getting love bites, hickeys... Whatever you want to call them. Part of it is the little pain that comes from the process of giving/getting them. In getting one, it is the surrender to them. In giving one, it's feeling the surrender that they give me under my lips and teeth.

The other part is having a mark from a lover (or seeing my mark on my lover).

Here's my most recent acquisition- a few days after the fact.


For a better idea of the placement: